Tag Archive for: moo

“Stop, or I’ll release the cow!” Officer Harold “Moo” Collins, the department Cow-9 handler, yelled as the burglary suspect headed toward a wooded area after breaking free from the two patrol cops who’d apprehended the thief.

The man could’ve been a track star, because at the sound of Collins’ voice he hit second gear and all that was seen of him after that point were the bottoms of his Chuck Taylors, one at a time as each foot lifted from the pavement, and two arms furiously pumping back and forth like the mechanical drive rods on each side of a speeding steam locomotive. He was in “feet don’t fail me now” mode.

“That’s right. Nobody wants to tangle with my attack cow, right Clarabelle?” said Collins as he opened the rear door to his patrol car to send the highly trained and aggressive Holstein-Friesian bovine in hot pursuit of the fleeing felon. “Find him, girl!” he said after delivering a playful pat to the animal’s hip.

“Don’t worry, she always gets her man,” he said to his two forlorn and ashamed peers who’d failed to hold on to the slippery stealer of other people’s property.

I know, the scenario above sounds a bit silly and farfetched. I mean, come on. Police cows?

However …

Just last week in Boone N.C., a town named after American pioneer Daniel Boone and that’s home to Appalachian State University, local officers and sheriff’s deputies were in engaged in a vehicle pursuit of a man who fled from a traffic stop. The man eventually abandoned his vehicle and ran into an undeveloped area containing wooded bits and a pasture. Due to the suspect’s high speeds and reckless driving, the pursuing officers were not close enough to him at the time he hopped out of his car to see which direction he’d traveled on foot. So they began a search but were unable to immediately locate him.

But help would soon arrive.

Yes, you guessed it. Their help came in the form of a herd of cows who were not at all pleased to have a potentially dangerous criminal hiding out in their neighborhood. They simply would not stand for that sort of nonsense and they meant to do something about it.

The pack of bovines approached the officers and were quite vocal and insisted that the cops follow them. So they did, and the cows led the parade of officers straight to where the suspect was hiding. The man was arrested, again, and transported to jail where he was charged with felony fleeing, eluding arrest with a motor vehicle, driving with a license revoked, and disorderly conduct.

Afterward, the department released a statement expressing their gratitude to the cows for their much-appreciated assistance. But they didn’t stop there, deciding to take things a step further by examining the possibilities of adding a Bovine Tracking Unit to their team.

First, though, they’d need to study the logistics of doing so, such as how they’d transport the Cow-9s to crime scenes, the costs associated with training the animals and veterinary care, and who’d fabricate their extra-extra-extra large ballistic vests. Then, there’s the problem of where in the patrol car to store the large pooper-scoopers needed for, well, you know, and what to do about the methane.

Since the animals’ assistance with locating the suspect was such a “moooooving” experience they thought they owed it to the cows to see if they could work it out.


The statement about adding a Bovine Tracking Unit to the department was a tongue-in-cheek comment. But hey, you never know. After all, a Vietnamese miniature potbellied pig called Harley was once used by Portland police to sniff out drugs.

Enter the Writers’ Police Academy’s 2023 Golden Donut Short Story Contest

Here’s a fantastic opportunity to get your writing in front of a top publisher!

Yes, Bookouture, a dynamic digital publisher of bestselling commercial fiction and a division of Hachette UK, is the official judge of the 2023 Writers’ Police Academy’s Golden Donut 200-word Short Story Contest.

So sharpen your pencils and fire up the computers. It’s time to put your imaginations to work.

The contrast rules are simple. Write a story about the photograph below using exactly 200 words, including the title. Each story needs an original title, and the image must be the main subject of the story. No clues as to the subject matter of the image or where it was taken. You decide. Let your imagination run wild. Remember though, what you see in the image absolutely must be the main subject of your tale.

Contest winner receives the Golden Donut Trophy!

*Proceeds are used to help with the massive expense of producing the 2023 Writers’ Police Academy. 


About Bookouture

We are a dynamic digital publisher of bestselling commercial fiction and a division of Hachette UK. We also publish commercial non-fiction under our Thread imprint.

Our unique publishing model and transformative campaigns have created unrivalled international author brands. We connect stories, authors and readers globally, publishing books that reflect the diversity of the societies we live in.

Our submissions are always open as we believe that everyone should have the opportunity to share their story. Over 60 million copies sold worldwide.





Are you interested in entering the world of digital publishing but don’t know where or how to begin? Well, I’m pleased to announce and offer an exciting Writers’ Police Academy Online course—Digital Publishing Academy. This class is a unique opportunity for writers to learn from and chat with a top industry professional, Commissioning Editor Susannah Hamilton of Bookouture, a division of Hachette UK. So, if you’ve wanted a foot in the door to a leading publisher, here’s your chance!

About the Course


Digital Publishing Academy

Date: June 24, 2023

Time: 1:00 – 2:30 p.m. EST

Registration: $15

Bookouture Editor Susannah Hamilton will talk about all things digital publishing, including what works well in digital, a look at the different stages of editing, and a brief foray into crime and thriller genre nuances for the digital market. Susannah will also give a brief overview of how Bookouture, a division of Hachette UK, works for its authors. There will be a Q&A at the end.

Click the link below to reserve your spot!


About Susannah Hamilton


Commissioning Editor Susannah Hamilton has over ten years of experience in the industry, and joined Bookouture in November 2021. Susannah’s list includes Kindle top 100 bestselling authors, such as Casey Kelleher, Elisabeth Carpenter and Amanda Lees, who have reached the charts in both the UK and the US. Susannah manages every element of the publishing strategy and process for her authors, supporting them every step of the way.